


Dragon Sickness

by snowkind



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: All The Bad Stuff, Alternate Universe, And then goes hella downhill, Blood and Gore, Diary/Journal, Don't ask me why I wrote this, Dragon Sickness, Excessive Violence, Gore, Horror, I cannot stress how messed up this is, M/M, Not for the squeamish, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Thorin, Short Story, Suicidal Thoughts, Sweet at first, Torture, Violence, Yandere, Yandere Thorin, bagginshield
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 18:23:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 23
Words: 12,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5596180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowkind/pseuds/snowkind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b> dra·gon sick·ness </b> ( dra-gən \ sik-nəs ) n. an apparent mental change caused by large amounts of treasure, particularly treasure hoarded by dragons; results in greedy, illogical, and even violent behavior<br/><br/>[ See also <i><b>gold sickness, gold fever, Thorin II Oakenshield</b></i> ]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All recognizable characters and places belong to J.R.R. Tolkien!
> 
> This short fanfiction, which is an adaption to both The Hobbit novel and films, was written because one night I couldn't sleep and for some reason thought a Yandere/Possessive Thorin would be pretty rad to write about.
> 
> Note, this story is **very** violent and pretty messed up and is not for the squeamish **at all**. I even got squeamish when writing it!  
>  Don't ask my why I decided to write this fic let alone finish it, but I present to you Yandere/Possessive Thorin!
> 
> Love,
> 
> May ( ˘ ³ ˘ )♥
> 
> P.S. The story is most likely embellished with various spelling errors and grammar issues... I tend to overlook a few things while writing and even re-reading! If you happen to spot any problems, please let me know so I may fix it! Thank you!

_April 26 th, 2941_

_A band of thirteen dwarves have infiltrated my house and pillaged my pantry. To say I am irritated would be a drastic understatement, but I cannot lie to myself and say that I do not want to go with them on their journey to Erebor. I have told them I will think about it and have sent them off on their way for now. An adventure certainly does sound exciting, but I fear it will be too much for a Hobbit of my stature. I’ve lived in comfort for so many years and maintain a respectable reputation, what more could I want? Their song, however, has moved something within me— perhaps my Took lineage was brought out when they sang. The dwarves themselves don’t seem too abhorrent to be around. Maybe a little rude at times, but their brotherly kindness warms my heart. Their leader, Thorin Oakenshield, seems to be a very interesting character. He doubts my skills but I am adamant on proving him wrong. For now, I’ll sleep on the decision of whether I should go or not._


	2. Chapter 2

_May 28 th, 2941            _

_I am tired beyond belief and I cannot believe we have already been traveling for a month. I miss home terribly, I am barely getting any sort of sleep without waking up every other moment to the sound of snoring dwarves, and I can’t even come to eating at least three meals a day! Right now we are currently resting near the edge of the Trollshaws. Balin says that we should be fine once we’re in the forest and we shouldn’t encounter any trolls if we’re careful, but I have a dreadful feeling about going in there regardless. Thorin still doubts my abilities as a burglar… I’m beginning to doubt myself too. Who was I trying to fool? I know myself that I’m not burglar material. I’m just a Hobbit who is in desperate need of sleep and food._


	3. Chapter 3

_June 16 th, 2941_

_Our stay here in Rivendell has been phenomenal. My heart still yearns for my cozy fireplace back in Bag End, but Elves sure know what they are doing. During our stay here in Rivendell I feel as if the dwarves are finally beginning to accept my presence. Ori especially seems keen on getting to know me. He is an avid, young dwarf who always carries around a journal to write in just like myself. He is also a surprisingly skilled artist, and his drawings of the various things we have encountered up to this point are very accurate. Though his sketch of me is a bit questionable… I don’t have that big of feet do I? Regardless, things seem to be rather merry among our little company. I have suspicions Thorin is **still** doubtful of my presence, but he has stopped giving me glares every time our eyes happen to meet. He has told us to gather tonight, I think it’s time to say goodbye to this wonderful, Elven city. I hope we can come back soon. _


	4. Chapter 4

_July 13 th, 2941_

_I’ve come across a rather peculiar, golden ring. There seems to be some mysterious Elvish engravings in the metal, and what’s even more mysterious is the fact that when I put the ring on other people cannot seem to see me. I think I’ll keep it a secret for now from the others, and it might come in handy to support my burglar façade I’ve been somehow successfully holding up._

_Thoring hugged me today. I think he’s finally warmed up to me, and I must admit that my own cheeks warmed up quite a bit when he did it. He’s always got such a menacing look etched onto his face, but at that moment on the Carrock…_

            “Master Baggins?” A rich, sonorous voice pulled the Hobbit out of his concentration. Speaking of the Devil…

            “Yes? What is it?” Bilbo offered the dwarf an awkward smile as he attempted to slowly close his journal.

            “It’s been quite a long day and I was wondering if you’d like to join me… and the others for a bath in the river.”

            “Ah! Yes, that sounds like a splendid idea. It’s about time I get the goblin and Orc smell off my body.” Bilbo chuckled and presently followed the other to where he presumed everyone else would be bathing.

His face seemed to immediately drain of all color when he realized that it was only going to be him and Thorin. A slight squeak emitted from his throat before he quickly tried to play it off by clearing his throat. He parted his lips as if to speak and then closed them again when he found that no words were willing to come out. Bilbo parted his mouth a second time when Thorin began to undress himself, his back facing the Hobbit, and then snapped his mouth shut when the dwarven king pulled the last article of clothing off his body and exposed himself to the warm, evening air.

            “I... Uh, where might the others… be?” Bilbo finally stammered out, averting his gaze to somewhere else as if he were looking for the others when Thorin turned to face him.

            “They must have finished when I came to fetch you.” His answer was bland and bold, a stark opposite to Bilbo’s meek and timid questions. It was obvious that the dwarf was not ashamed to be naked. Why should he be?

            “You’re still clothed, did you in fact not want to bathe?” Thorin asked, his voice tall and husky with the sound of a hidden smile in it.

            “N-No… I am going to change right now.” Bilbo replied with a stammer and waited in awkward silence until he finally heard the quiet splashing Thorin made when he entered the river.

The Hobbit turned around and then began to peel back the layers of his clothes, clumsily dropping them to the ground one piece at a time. He felt a searing heat reside in his cheeks, and in the back of his mind he thought that Thorin was watching his every movement. Sucking in the evening air through clenched teeth, Bilbo turned his head just a bit and felt a wave of relief wash over him when he saw that the dwarf’s back was to him and instead had his eyes fixated on the moon. Thorin’s back, however, immediately captured the Hobbit’s gaze and he soon found himself frozen with his trousers halfway taken off and his eyes tracing the curves of the dwarf’s well-defined back. Under all those clothes that Thorin wore, his body appeared to be chiseled by hard work and accented with scars that marred his golden skin and carried the weight of his people as he tried to forge a new hope for the future.

            “Erebor used to always b-” Thorin suddenly began, turning around to be unexpectedly met with a flash of bare skin and then a large splash of water to his face.

Too shocked to really comprehend what had just happened, Thorin watched as Bilbo popped up from the surface of the water and began to sputter while blindly wiping hair out of his face. When the Hobbit had finally settled down and the two were once more enveloped with a rather uncomfortable silence, the dwarf chuckled and slowly shook his head.

            “You’re always full of surprises, Master Baggins.”

            “Yes… well I figured it might have been fun to jump into the water since it’s never _not_ a good time to have a little…fun? Especially under these grave… circumstances we’re… under.” Bilbo replied with a weak chuckle and nodded his head, his face contorting into a puzzled expression as he made up the excuse to explain why he had jumped into the water. He most definitely did not jump because he didn’t want Thorin to see him naked, no, no! Definitely not that reason at all.


	5. Chapter 5

_July 19 th, 2941_

_We’re currently resting near the edge of Mirkwood. I’m entirely grateful to Beorn and his hospitality. He’s supplied us with food and water, and I’m positive we can make it through this wretched forest with a breeze. Unfortunately Gandalf had to leave us, but I’m sure we can manage without his presence… though I do feel safer with such a powerful wizard around. However, Thorin is a capable leader and I know he can lead us to safety. We’ve been talking more often as of late; especially after that one evening we bathed together. He smiles more whenever we meet and I feel like a foolish child when I get near him. Even just writing about him makes me irritably giddy. How silly is that? A Hobbit and a dwarf, what absolute nonsense! And there is no way he might even remotely return this affection I feel for him, which is probably nothing and I’m probably just too tired to distinguish my admiration for the handsome dwarf and my love for him. Handsome? Love? Oh dear, I did not just write that._


	6. Chapter 6

_July 26 th 2941_

_I’m sick of this forest, I’m sick of the spiders that almost ate the whole company, and I’m sick of being tired. I want to return home soon, I don’t care about what treasures may life ahead. I just wa_

Bilbo quickly set down his pencil and closed his journal when he heard a rustle through the leaves. He stood up from his spot and peered into the silent darkness. When he heard the rustling again, he slowly reached into his pocket and felt his thumb just barely grazing the cool metal of the ring.

            “Master Baggins.” A voice whispered from the darkness.

            “Who is it?” Bilbo frowned and squinted his eyes to try and make out who he was talking to.

            “About today… Your actions were valiant and heroic. I wanted to thank you for saving us today from the spiders. So… thank you.” The voice replied.

            “I, uh…ahem. You’re very welcome.” A look of surprise took hold of the Hobbit’s face and he straightened himself out.

            “But… er, whom might I be speaking to? It’s too dark to see.” Bilbo continued sheepishly and started to laugh but quickly shut his mouth when he felt what appeared to be a pair of lips pressed against his forehead. He squeezed his eyes shut and wrinkled his nose a bit as the short bristles of a beard brushed his face. In a matter of seconds the warmth and itchiness disappeared altogether, leaving a faint and comforting smell of someone Bilbo knew quite well.

            “Thank you…” The voice whispered again.


	7. Chapter 7

_August 23 rd, 2941_

_The dwarves have been captured and brought into the Elvenking’s Halls. I managed to sneak inside unnoticed, but I have no clue what I should do or how I can help the dwarves escape. I guess I should have a look around and see what I can find… Hopefully the keys to the cells the dwarves are being held in. But I probably should find them first! If only these halls weren’t so big…_

Bilbo sighed and tucked away his journal before finally gathering the courage to step out of the shadows and explore the grand halls. Despite being invisible with the help of the ring, he couldn’t help but have a mini-heart attack whenever an elf passed by or he heard talking just around the corner. With any luck though, his mindless wandering would hopefully lead him to Thorin and the others. And so it did.

At first the Hobbit wasn’t quite sure he had found the right set of prisoners, but when he heard the resonant voice of the dwarven king and his furious sounding Khuzdul insults, he knew he had found the right bunch.

Bilbo clambered down the expansive set of stairs as quickly as possible, excitement filling his heart now that he had reunited with the others, but abruptly stopped near the end of the stairway. He needed to be patient and it would be bad if he gave all the dwarves a false sense of hope that he would get them out. The male wasn’t even sure if _he_ could get out without being noticed and he already had a leg up on everyone considering how he had a magic ring and all. But still, he needed to figure out a sure way to help the dwarves escape and until he could figure out a plan, Bilbo decided to only reveal himself to the one dwarf he trusted the most.

            “Master Baggins!” Thorin immediately rose from the ground and wrapped his hands around the thick bars depriving him of his freedom.

Bilbo quickly hushed the dwarf and leaned in so they could exchange a quiet conversation.

            “Are you hurt? How did you get here? Were you noticed?” Thorin whispered quickly, his piercingly blue eyes searching over the Hobbit in an almost fearful manner.

            “No, I’m not hurt. I managed to sneak in so no, I wasn’t noticed. Pretty good burglar you have, wouldn’t you agree?” Bilbo answered slowly, a smile of pride gradually growing on his lips.

Thorin paused before speaking, his own lips forming into a smile and eyes glinting with a sort of contentment.

            “Good…” He finally breathed out and released his grip on the bars.

            “Yes, good indeed but… well I’m not exactly sure how I can help you escape. O-Or rather I will need some time in order to find a way to help you escape. I think I heard something about a festival… maybe whenever that happens I’ll manage to get a hold of the keys or _something_.”

            “Master Baggins… you truly are something else. I’m sure whatever you think of will be good, but I think that festival will be our best bet in getting out. Lay low until then.”

Bilbo nodded and swallowed with slight difficulty, his eyebrows now furrowing together.

            “Will you be alright?” He asked the dwarf quietly and wrapped his own hands around the bars.

            “I will be fine knowing that you’re safe… Take your time finding a way out, but my first priority is that you keep yourself safe.” Thorin replied calmly and then took the Hobbit’s hands into his own.

            “I can’t have my talented burglar be caught by someone else, now can I?”


	8. Chapter 8

_September 25 th, 2941_

_We have arrived Lake-town with a rather warm welcome. It’s a bit disconcerting but after telling the King of Lake-town our plans to reclaim Erebor, he seems very adamant on helping us. I’m in no position to judge as I have simply tagged along for this entire journey, but I have my suspicions that the King has something up his sleeves. On the other hand, our company’s own king has been very delighted that we’re almost done with our goal. I find that his whole being has grown happier, and he’s reclaimed a very mighty glow that suits him perfectly. It’s almost mesmerizing to look at him… not that I’m looking at him often. Ever since we’ve arrived though we have all been bombarded with luxury and people don’t want to stop asking about our travels. I haven’t had much time to even **see** Thorin…_

Bilbo set aside his journal and closed his eyes. An empty feeling seemed to fill his whole chest and for some reason he felt like crying. Maybe it was just the nerves catching up to him. He felt like he hadn’t really had a chance to catch his breath starting way back when in May. With the encounter with the trolls all the way up to the bumpy ride down the Forest River, and now he was finally burning himself out—like a candlelight flickering and trying to hold on to its last sparks of life. Crawling into the oversized bed he had been provided with, the Hobbit quickly drifted off into an emotionless, desolate sleep.

            “-aggins. Master Baggins. Master Baggins!”

Bilbo snapped his eyes open and jerked up from his sleep, his head immediately colliding into another person’s. Thorin groaned slightly at the impact but swiftly returned to normal and scooped the half-awake, half-scowling in pain Hobbit into his arms before either could register what was happening.

            “My apologies, are you alright? I shouldn’t have scared you.” The dwarf looked over Bilbo with worried eyes and held him closer to his chest.

            “I’m f-fine, but what are you doing in my room?”

            “I… I thought we could talk before we finally ascend the Mountain.”

            “And… is this your usual way of talking?” Bilbo breathed softly and moved his body just a bit to bring the odd cradling position to the front of their conversation.

Thorin looked away from a brief moment before setting the Hobbit down onto the soft mattress. He leaned back a bit to give Bilbo some space and opted to sit on the utmost edge of the bed in silence.

            “What did you want to talk about?” Bilbo eventually asked, curious eyes now searching the king’s face for an answer he was bound to get sooner or later.

            “When we reach the Mountain… you might die.”

            “That’s a lovely conversation starter to wake up to.”

            “No, I…” Thorin inhaled sharply and clenched the blanket beneath him into a fist.

            “It’s very difficult for me to speak my mind when I’m around you… there’s something about you that makes my body do things… _feel_ things that I’ve never dealt with before. I’ve always dealt with direct, straight to the point things that can easily be solved with violence but when I met you… Well to be honest when I first met you I thought you were an insufferable, spineless, piteous creature.”

            “Oh… good.” Bilbo interjected quietly, his eyebrows knitting together.

            “What… exactly are you hoping to accomplish with this conversation?”

Thorin sighed heavily and brought a hand to his face.

            “I’ve always been wrong when it comes to you. I’ve never been more wrong in my life and… and to lie to myself and say that I don’t want to hold you close and that I don’t want to have you by my side forever… Well, it’d only be a lie.” He removed his hand from his face and looked over at Bilbo with a softened yet confused expression.

            “I’ve never felt this way before about anyone I’ve met. Tell me, do you feel the same way?”

Bilbo gaped his mouth open before closing it and then repeated the action again as if he were a fish gasping for air. He proceeded to do this for several more moments until at last the dwarf leaned in and tenderly brushed his fingers against his cheek.

            “Forgive me if I overstep my boundaries…” Thorin breathed the words into the kiss he suddenly charged the Hobbit with, and Bilbo did nothing but sit in shock while his nose was infiltrated with the earthy smell of the dwarf and his mouth was filled with the rich taste of wine and the mysterious, savory flavor of his saliva.

It wasn’t long until Bilbo _melted_ into the kiss and he began to move his mouth in sync with the other. Whether Thorin was drunk or not didn’t matter, and whether he meant what he had said was true or not didn’t either. This was what Bilbo wanted. What he wanted before he even knew he wanted it. What he wanted when he first laid eyes on Thorin’s royal visage. What he wanted to help fill the gaping cavity in his heart. And he wanted all of him.

Soon the kiss began to progress into a more passionate one, and at the slight flick of Thorin’s tongue against Bilbo’s lower lip, he yielded access to his mouth. His mouth was quickly received with eager demonstration as Thorin explored the Hobbit’s mouth, and he let a low growl rumble through his throat when Bilbo broke the kiss for air.

            “W-Wait, Thorin…”

Thorin ignored his plea, overwhelmed by the taste of the other, and gently pushed Bilbo down to the bed before mounting on top of him. Careful to not crush the Hobbit beneath him, he leaned down and began to enthusiastically nibble at the exposed skin on Bilbo’s neck. The Hobbit replied with a suppressed moan and though he was reluctant to, he squirmed uncomfortably beneath the dwarf to signal him to stop.

            “I…I’m sorry, Thorin. I think we’re moving too fast.” Bilbo stammered breathlessly and tried his best to move out from under the other.

Thorin closed his eyes and grit his teeth for a moment before exhaling slowly. He promptly moved off of Bilbo and turned to take a seat back on the edge of the bed.

            “No, you’re right. I’m sorry I forced myself onto you. I got too caught up by… you.”

            “It’s alright! I liked it. I just… I want to appreciate it at a slower pace. I don’t want everything to be over with so soon.” Bilbo murmured softly, his eyes drifting to the ceiling. And he was right. He didn’t want it to end. This journey. His times with the dwarves. Even the life-threatening times! He relished all of it because it was different than anything he had ever experienced in his entire lifetime. It was exhilarating…

> Bilbo pressed his lips into a thin line and paused for a moment to think about what to do next. Then, in one swift movement, he moved towards Thorin to give him a quick peck on the cheek.

and he never wanted it to end.


	9. Chapter 9

_October 7 th, 2941_

_The Mountain gave us all a great scare by making us think we had lost hope in finding a way in. The last light of Durin’s day meant the moonlight, not the sunlight! Whoever wrote those runes must have had a blast writing it. I hope whoever wrote it knows that they almost wasted a whole year’s worth of adventure. Or… perhaps not wasted. I personally had a lot of fun, but I know this meant a lot to everyone in the company so I’m glad we managed to get in. On the other hand I’m terrified beyond belief that I need to sneak in and check up on Smaug. No big deal, right? Ha! Everyone has been making it seem like it won’t be a big deal, but I hope they realize I have to see if there’s a ginormous, fire-breathing dragon buried somewhere in the gold. A dragon that has been fabled to have teeth like swords and claws spears! I don’t know about anyone else but I certainly wouldn’t want to see anything with that sort of description. Not even if it were my own father! Okay, maybe not if it were ‘ol Bungo, but you get what I mean. And yet no one seems to even want to give me the slightest amount of remorse for sending me down there. Well… not **no one**. Thorin seems to be the only one who actually cares about my well being going down there. In fact, he’s suggested to me that I shouldn’t go down which although is a very tempting proposition, is the whole reason why I’ve been brought on the trip. I’m stupidly happy to know that Thorin cares about me this much. Things obviously haven’t been the same since that kiss we shared in Lake-town. I can barely think about him without getting the least bit of excited, and I can barely look at him without feeling my face heat up a bit. Yes! I confess that I am such a child, but I’m a very happy one and happier at the thought that he returns my feelings. _

_I’m in love with Thorin Oakenshield._

_There, I finally got it out and I know for a fact that’s how I feel about it. Now just to make sure no one ever gets a hold of this journal._


	10. Chapter 10

_October 20 th, 2941_

_What have we done._

_Smaug has left the castle and has brought Esgaroth into complete ruin. I can’t even begin to describe how cowardly and miserable I feel. The smell of smoke has lingered even all the way to the top of this mountain, and it’s like I can hear the cries of those innocent Men. This is horrible. I’m horrible. And what’s more to add is that I’ve got the Arkenstone in my possession while Thorin is off wildly searching for it. Something isn’t right with him. Balin recently mentioned something about dragon sickness, and it just sounds dreadful. I don’t want Thorin to have any sort of sickness. Maybe I should give him the Arkenstone. It might make him less… dragon and more like the dwarf I decided to give up a year’s worth of my time to._

_More like the Thorin I fell in love with._


	11. Chapter 11

_November 22 nd, 2941_

_My heart is in shambles. I’ve been kicked out by Thorin himself for giving the Arkenstone away. I don’t blame his anger, but I wouldn’t go so far to kick me out under the pretense of disloyalty… I was just trying to help, why can’t he see that? He’s gone mad with greed and I can’t find Thorin anywhere in those icy eyes of his. I’m hoping to be able to talk to him before anything gets worse, but it looks like war is on the brink of occurring. Everyone is preparing to fight. I can hear swords being sharpened right this instance. I wonder how the other dwarves are doing. I hope they aren’t as miserable as I am feeling._


	12. Chapter 12

_November 24 th, 2941_

_The battle is over and though I am joyful that we’ve managed to defend Erebor against the Orcs, I am tired with pain and grief. Fíli and Kíli were slain in battle while protecting Thorin… He’s still devastated by the loss more than anyone else in the company. Of course they are his beloved nephews, but it tears me apart even more to see him with such sorrow. We are going to hold the funeral tonight and then I am going to prepare to leave and return to Bag End. My work here as a burglar is done, and I think my Took side has had enough adventure to last a lifetime. I don’t belong here anyways. I belong in my hole in the hillside with a pipe in my mouth and a fireplace to warm my toes. I will miss everyone though…_

            “Bilbo?” Ori popped his head into the room.

            “I’m sorry to interrupt you, but I thought it would be nice to tell you that we’re about to set the boats down the river.”

            “Oh…” Bilbo replied solemnly and closed his journal.

            “Thank you for letting me know, I’ll be right there.” He continued to say with a saddened smile and watched as the young dwarf left.

Bilbo let out a somewhat frustrated groan and ran both his hands through his disheveled hair. He had been to several funerals before, but the gloomy feeling he currently held in his chest was something more. At that moment he heard another soft knock on the door but before he could ask them who it was, Thorin let himself in. It was obvious that the king had been crying, but Bilbo made no comment about it or offered any sort of consolation. The atmosphere felt thick and tense and made the hairs on his feet rise with anticipation.

            “I’m sorry.” Thorin blurted out.

            “Sorry?” Bilbo repeated with wonder.

            “Yes. I haven’t been acting myself ever since we reclaimed my kingdom, and I realize how poorly I’ve treated you and everyone around me. I’m sorry for… everything.”

The bitter ice that had replaced the dwarf’s sky-blue eyes seemed to thaw at that second when he looked into Bilbo’s face, and suddenly a steam of tears came spilling down his regal cheeks. The deterioration of Thorin’s demeanor caught Bilbo off guard, and without thinking about it he rushed to his side and held him in a tender embrace.

            “It… It’s okay. Just let it all out. None of this was your fault…” Bilbo held the weeping king in his arms for what felt like ages until finally Thorin gradually began to compose himself once more and could stand up on his own. With one more sigh and one more embrace, Thorin gave Bilbo a pat on the back and a wry smile.

            “This may be too much to ask… but would you ever forgive me?”

            “Of course I would, and I’ll keep on forgiving you for however many times you need me to tell you because I know that you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. Now… shall we go see the boats off?”


	13. Chapter 13

_November 27 th, 2941_

_Now that our journey has officially come to an end, our company has disbanded and everything seems to be at peace. There’s really no need for me here and I do miss home an awful lot, but maybe I’ve found a new home? Thorin has begged me not to leave. I know it sounds crazy, but I might actually want to stay. Maybe it’s time to start a new chapter in my life and begin a new one here in Erebor. Thorin has already accommodated me with a room that I may stay in for as long as I’d like. He treats me like royalty even though he is the one who has royal blood running through his veins, and he’s even offered to bring in pieces of furniture from my own home in Bag End. If that’s the case… I don’t see any other reason why I should leave. And even though Thorin was acting a bit strange with all that dragon sickness mumbo jumbo, I think he’s recovered back to his original self. So why wouldn’t I want to live with the love of my life? I think it’s time to say goodbye to Bag End instead… I love Thorin and I believe I will love my new life here in Erebor._


	14. Chapter 14

_December 3 rd, 2941_

_No one has come to visit. There has been no sign or even mention of Óin, Glóin, Balin, Dwalin, Ori, Dori, Nori, Bifur, Bofur, or Bombur. Not even Gandalf! I wonder if they’ve forgotten about me. I certainly haven’t considering how I remember all of their names! It’s a bit depressing… but at least Thorin is still here. We haven’t spent as much time together as I’d like to, and sometimes I wake up alone in bed only to find Thorin roaming the extravagant halls of this castle. I think the gold might be getting to him… he spends a lot of time just staring off in the distance at the immense amount of gold that has been hoarded up within these walls. Although some of the treasure has been agreed to be sent to Bard and the Men who now inhabit Dale, there is still plenty of leftover lying **everywhere**. I’m too afraid to confront Thorin about his strange actions. He snaps at me sometimes, but he always apologizes afterwards. Maybe I’m just being too paranoid. I need to get out of these halls for a little bit. If walk around Dale I might even bump into and old friend or two! _


	15. Chapter 15

_December 10 th, 2941_

_I’ve met a rather kind girl in the city of Dale. Her name is Elizabeth, and she’s always eager to see me. We’ve spent a lot of time in each other’s company whenever Thorin is off wandering the halls. He’s grown even more distant, and I fear he doesn’t love me anymore. To be honest, I’m not sure he ever has… But Elizabeth on the other hand is constantly bursting with the happiness and friendly warmth I long for. She’s a great joy to be around. I’ve found a small figurine among the treasures in this castle that resembles a cat. Elizabeth is very fond of cats, so I think I’ll bring it to her today. I think she’ll be very pleased with this gift; her smile is one of the most beautiful sights I’ve ever seen. I can’t wait to see her again._

Bilbo set aside his journal triumphantly and then began to rummage around through the desk he had in the room he now shared with Thorin. A great smile began to form on his lips when he found the miniature, golden cat figure he had written about, and he was about to put it into his pocket and be on his way until Thorin burst into the room. Quickly hiding his journal and shoving the figurine into his pocket, Bilbo stood up from his chair to meet the other.

            “Thorin! It’s great to see you.”

            “Where are you going?” The dwarf asked roughly, a scowl darkening his face.

            “Hm? Me? Oh, nowhere really. Just thought I might take a walk through Dale.”

            “For what reason?” Thorin walked closer to Bilbo, his voice dipping lower.

            “I. It’s nice. There’s nice weather today… Good for walking.” Bilbo began to stammer and backed up a bit into the chair he was sitting in.

            “Is that all?” He stopped a few steps away from the Hobbit.

            “I… W-Well… You know Elizabeth? I’ve mentioned her a few times briefly. I was just going to visit her for a little bit.” Bilbo broke down, his words now spilling out in a clumsy manner.

            “And were you going to give her something?” Thorin raised an eyebrow as his eyes quickly flickered to Bilbo’s pocket.

            “N-No. I wasn’t planning on it.” He squeaked in response.

But before Bilbo could even flinch a muscle or bat an eye, Thorin had thrust his hand out and snatched a golden object from his pocket.

            “And were you planning on **stealing** from me!” Thorin suddenly roared, his eyes lighting up with an intense, sinister flame that Bilbo had never seen before.

            “No! I truly wasn’t! I just thought she might have enjoyed that ca-” Bilbo stopped abruptly and felt the color drain from his face. In between Thorin’s fingers was the ring he had stolen from Gollum.

            “W-Wait. Thorin, you don’t understand. That ring is min-”

            “Don’t understand? **Don’t understand!?** I am perfectly aware that you’ve been disloyal to me! Have I not provided you with enough? And now not only are you throwing yourself at this pathetic slut, but now you’re _stealing_ from me? I thought I could TRUST you!”

            “I promise I wasn’t trying to steal from you! And I’m not in a romantic relationship with Elizabeth or anything of that nature! You’ve got this all wrong! Just calm down, Thorin!” Bilbo voice began to quiver as he retorted against Thorin’s unnecessary yelling. It seemed to calm Thorin down for a split second until he suddenly rushed forwards and slammed his lips into Bilbo’s. The attempted kiss was messy and hurt when their lips and teeth collided, but what hurt even more was when the dwarf’s teeth accidentally cut a large gash into Bilbo’s lower lip.

            “Ow!” Bilbo staggered backwards, crashing into the desk behind him. He swiftly brought his fingers to his lip and found blood gushing out and staining his skin.

            “That hurt!” He screamed at the other and scrambled around Thorin before running to the other end of the room.

Thorin, shocked at the sight of blood and the hateful expression scribbled onto Bilbo’s face, immediately followed after him with a worried look.

            “I’m sorry! I’m _so_ sorry, Bilbo! I didn’t mean to cut you! My teeth…” He stopped for a second and brought his own hand to his teeth, lightly grazing the edges of them only to find that they were unnaturally sharp—like the tip of a sword.

            “My teeth…” Thorin’s eyes widened and he swayed to the side.

            “I’m sorry, Bilbo… I didn’t mean to…” He continued, eyes barely lifting from the ground to see the terrified look on Bilbo’s face.

            “Didn’t mean to…”


	16. Chapter 16

_December 20 th, 2941_

_Thorin has gotten kinder ever since he accidentally hurt me. My lips has recovered relatively well, and it’s honestly not a big deal but I’m still being a bit mean to him because he didn’t just hurt me on my lip but also on my heart. Cheesy, I know, but I almost want to say I regret staying here in Erebor. I thought Thorin loved me and wanted me to stay, but I’m not sure any more. I think he needs me though… I need to somehow fix him. Is it dragon sickness that has been making him act like this? How do I fix it? I need to find someone to help me… He’s boarded up all the exits and entrances though, and only he is allowed to leave the castle. Is he trying to be overprotective? I’m kind of scared by his actions. And he’s got the ring too. I’m unsure as to whether or not he knows its true powers, but either way I need to get it back. My mind is in utter chaos right now._

Not a moment after Bilbo had punctuated the sentence had passed when he suddenly heard a shriek bellow through the halls. Ramming his journal into its hidden position, the Hobbit sprung from his chair and sprinted to the main hall where the scream had originated.

            “Is everything alrigh-” He skidded to a stop and gasped when he saw Elizabeth sprawled on the floor. She was naked, bawling, and unable to escape because Thorin had a grip on her hair.

            “Thorin! Let her go! She’s done nothing wrong!” Bilbo regained his mind and began to rush towards the other before stopping again when the other began to shout.

            “Done nothing wrong!? Done nothing wrong… Don’t make me laugh!” Thorin sneered and spit into Elizabeth’s hair.

            “I caught this girl… this whore sneaking around the castle! How can you tell me that she’s done nothing wrong when she’s clearly been stealing from me!”

            “She hasn’t stolen anything!” Bilbo growled in response.

Thorin threw his head back and replied with another snide laugh.

            “She’s stolen **everything** from me! And for that she needs to be punished.”

Elizabeth began to squirm violently under Thorin’s grasp, and she screamed out in pain when he raised a foot and swiftly brought it down onto her knee. An audible crack could be heard as her bone splintered against the marble floor, and Elizabeth continued to sob uncontrollably.

A rage began to build up in Bilbo and he wanted to tackle Thorin to the ground, but fear paralyzed him in his spot and all he could do was look on with hateful eyes.

            “Y-You’re not thinking straight, Thorin… She hasn’t stolen anything from you.”

            “She’s stolen **you**!” He shouted fiercely, spit flying from his lips.

            “She’s stolen you and I aim to reclaim you as my own!” Thorin began to drag the poor girl along the floor until he reached the steps leading up to his throne. Laying on one of the steps was a sword, and Bilbo couldn’t help but close his eyes the moment the deranged king lifted the weapon high above his head and swung it down. Half-expecting to hear Elizabeth’s ear-shattering cries stop, they only grew louder and prompted Bilbo to open his eyes again. He found himself gagging and felt his legs grow weak beneath him when he saw that Thorin had cut off one of Elizabeth’s breast. The lump of flesh lay not too far from the girl, and she could do nothing but blubber in pain and fear.

            “I’m so sorry this is happening to you… I’m _so_ sorry… _So so_ sorry…” Bilbo apologized repeatedly and quietly to himself, tears now beginning to slide down his cheeks.

            “This nasty, lying wretch! Can’t you see, Bilbo? She’s been deceiving you! Tricking you into thinking that she loves you when in reality she’s just here to steal the treasure I am saving for you. **You!** Everything I do is for you! My dear love, it’s all for you! I’m only protecting you! But if she thinks she can steal from me then how about we give her the gold she’s been desiring?” Thorin’s words took a sharp turn and he immediately let go of the girl, allowing her to slump to the floor in a sniveling mess. He turned around and picked up a pair of heavy tongs that could be found in the castle’s forge, and at the end of the tool was a cup of molten gold.

            “Thorin, no…” Bilbo’s voice had shrunk to almost nothing at this point, and he finally fell to his knee when Thorin violently took hold of Elizabeth’s mouth, forcing it open, and began to pour the scorching hot liquid down her throat. Her body spasmed and jerked in irregular positions before stopping altogether when the shimmering liquid overflowed from her mouth and dripped onto her bare thighs. Thorin dropped her tortured body to the ground with a thud, and grinned widely. He tilted his head to the side and looked over at Bilbo with wide, feral eyes.

            “All for you, my love. But it pains me to know that you’ve been cheating on me. Don’t worry, I’ll forgive you! And I’ll keep on forgiving you for however many times you need me to tell you because I know that you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong...”

Bilbo shuddered at the crazed look Thorin had carved into his face and tried his best to pick himself up to run away. His legs felt numb at this point, however, and all he could really do was stare on in fear while the dwarf slowly approached him with a dagger held firmly in his hands.

            “W-Wait, Thorin…”

Thorin ignored Bilbo’s plea, and gently turned Bilbo onto his back before mounting on top of him. He flashed him another wide smile before bringing the dagger to the Hobbit’s cheek, the edge just barely scraping his skin. Bilbo trembled underneath the dwarf and stared with wide eyes into the Thorin’s face, searching for any hint that the dwarf he met back in Bag End was still there. Nothing. Thorin’s eyes looked desolate save for a mad gleam. In fact, his pupils looked a bit elongated, similar to the eyes of a drago-

Bilbo screeched out in pain when the dwarf suddenly drove the end of the dagger into his left eye. He writhed in pain and screamed until his lungs started to burn. Slowly but surely, Thorin angled the dagger and dug his eye out of its socket until it was dangling above Bilbo’s tormented face. He gave a final grunt and wrenched his arm backwards, snapping the optical nerve from the socket. At the same time, Bilbo gave a final shriek before finally slipping into a more soothing unconsciousness.


	17. Chapter 17

_December 28 th, 2941_

_I need to get out._

_I thought I could help save Thorin from this appalling sickness, but I think he’s too far gone. I don’t know where he’s hidden the ring, but I think it’s my best chance for escape. For now I’ll have to loosen up some of the boards in one of the exits he rarely uses._

_I need to get out._

He set the journal back into its hiding spot and left the empty room quietly. Thorin was off doing who knows what, but whatever he was doing gave the Hobbit some time to scour the darker parts of the castle and settle on an exit he could start to try and unboard. Once he had found a suitable exit near the far corner of the main hall, he got to work and started to claw at the nails that fastened the way out. His fingers began to throb with pain the longer he dug, wood splinters working their way underneath his own nails and piercing his skin. It started to hurt to the point where tears unwillingly floated down his cheeks and his fingers were trembling with blood. At last, after hours of scratching away, Bilbo had managed to dig four of the six nails out from the wood. When he started to work on the fifth nail, he heard Thorin’s thunderous voice bounce through the castle. He quickly hid the pile of metal in the corner and rushed back to their shared bedroom.

            “Bilbo, where have you been?”

Thorin was laying on the bed when he entered, and his eyes instantly seemed to bore holes into him when he stepped into the room.

            “I…I’ve just been walking around.”

The dwarf narrowed his eyes a bit, causing Bilbo to hide his bloodied hands behind his back, before finally beckoning the Hobbit to come to him. Bilbo reluctantly edged closer to the bed and took a rigid seat on far edge of the mattress from the other. He stiffened even more when Thorin began to crawl over to where Bilbo was sitting, and almost felt like vomiting when he leaned in and pressed his chapped lips against his cheek.

            “Do you love me?” Thorin suddenly asked.

Bilbo blinked quickly and felt his mouth dry up.

            “I… I do love you.” He rasped in response, still maintaining his stiff position on the edge of the bed.

            “Good…” Thorin breathed out softly, the warm air repulsing the Hobbit as it danced along his ears and skin.

Thorin began to unexpectedly cough, however, and abruptly pulled away from Bilbo’s side. He clambered to the opposite end of the bed and continued to violently choke. Bilbo watched in trepidation and cringed when the dwarf began to vomit. Smoke oddly began to make his eyes water and in a matter of seconds Bilbo realized that Thorin was throwing up a freakish sort of mixture of molten lava, coal, and last night’s meal.

There was something definitely wrong with him.


	18. Chapter 18

_January 5 th, 2942_

_When I thought all hope of my escape was lost, Balin came to visit. I think he came to visit because he was worried about Thorin’s shut away attitude. I wish he came sooner… Obviously Thorin tried to hide me from the other, but before Balin could leave I managed to get a hold of him in secret. It turns out Thorin told everyone that I already returned back to Bag End. That explains why it seems like everyone has forgotten about me. Thorin is sicker than I thought him out to be… Anyways, Balin agreed to help me escape. I wish he could have taken me when he was leaving but that might have put his life into danger. I can’t have anyone else dying because of Thorin’s morbid obsession over me or his gold. He says he has an idea as to how I might be able to escape, but he’ll have to return at a later day. I anticipate his return with great joy and until then will remain low and obedient. I don’t know how much longer I can take this._


	19. Chapter 19

_January 12 th, 2942_

_Balin has yet to return. It is already evening time and it’s been seven days. Thorin also found out about the exit I was trying to unboard. He’s nailed everything up with twice as many nails. I’m beginning to lose hope. Maybe I am destined to be stuck in this tortuous castle with a deranged king forever. If Balin doesn’t show up tomorrow, I think I’ll try to kill myself._

            “Bilbo!” He heard the dwarf call his name through the echoing halls and immediately hastened to meet the king. Nowadays Thorin had little patience for anything, and he was increasingly more violent than ever. Bilbo feared that if he wasn’t up and ready at every one of Thorin’s calls, he’d be flayed alive or something ghastly of that nature.

            “It’s supper time, I thought I’d treat you to something delicious since you’ve been so good lately.” The king was already sitting at the end of the table by the time Bilbo arrived, and he gestured with one arm for him to sit down next to him.

            “Oh, I… thank you so much.” Bilbo replied quietly, his eyebrows raised with surprise. This was a certainly a change.

He took a hesitant seat next to his king’s right side and waited for further instruction while he surveyed the copious amount of food on the table. The meal was much too big for two people as it had plates and bowls of roast mutton, mashed potatoes, thick sliced pieces of ham, cherry tomatoes, loaves of bread, blocks of cheese, sausage links, and everything that made the Hobbit water in the mouth. The food covered up half the table from one end of the table to the other, and Bilbo was still positive he could finish it all by himself. A usual night’s dinner normally consisted of a bowl of soup and with the slightest chance of some form of meat, and because of the scarce amount of food that Bilbo wasn’t accustomed to, he had grown terribly thin and emaciated. But this? This was a feast certainly fit for a king and it was a feast that the Hobbit had an inkling of having every evening when he thought staying here in Erebor would actually be enjoyable. Thorin gestured again to start eating and pushing all other trifles aside, Bilbo silently thanked Eru and then began to help himself.

He first sunk his teeth into a juicy tomato, and marveled at the sweetness and freshness of the item before he started to shovel mouthfuls of steaming mashed potatoes into his mouth. A hum of delight unintentionally vibrated through his throat when he brought his lips to the frothy ale and began to gulp unceremoniously until he felt fully quenched for the first time in several months. At last after filling himself up with the various small dishes, Bilbo reached over for the mutton and quickly bit into the juicy meat. His face almost immediately soured at the sudden flush of fat he tasted, but forced himself to swallow the bite down regardless. It was then that Thorin began to speak.

            “Balin came the other day to visit. Did you know that?”

Bilbo paused his eating and nodded slowly, alarmed eyes now never leaving the king’s.

            “He asked about you. Have you been talking to him recently?”

Bilbo clenched his jaw and shook his head.

            “No, I haven’t had a chance to talk to him.”

Thorin closed his eyes and tilted his head to the side, rolling it along his shoulders as if in great pain. He snarled and snapped his eyes open, a frightening look swiftly taking hold of his face.

            “WHY MUST YOU LIE TO ME?”

            “I don’t… I don’t know what you mean.” Bilbo yelped and dropped hold of his food.

            “I know Balin has been talking to you…” Thorin hissed.

            “BUT YOU’RE MINE! YOU BELONG TO ME ONLY! AND THAT’S WHAT TRAITORS GET! THEY DESERVE TO BE _PUNISHED_! **BUTCHERED**!” The dwarf suddenly slammed his fist down on the table and stood up from his chair.

The plates rattled underneath his pounding and his chair fell backwards, landing with a loud crash. Bilbo slowed his chewing down, a feeling of terror filling up in his stomach. His eye flickered from the heaving dwarf to the mutton on the table. He gagged and immediately felt sick to his very core. Though roasted and charred, Bilbo could make out the discernable shape of the pudgy fingers and arm of a dwarf. He slipped out of his chair and stumbled backwards, his whole stomach now mutinying against him while an awful taste churned in the back of his throat and a putrid smell filled his nose. He began to retch and doubled over onto his knees, almost hitting his head against the chair in the meantime. At last he started to vomit back up all the food he had gorged himself on—so that’s what dwarf tasted like.


	20. Chapter 20

_January 14 th, 2942_

_I don’t know what else I can write. Now that ~~Balin~~ he is gone, I don’t know what else I can do. Thorin watches my every move and it’s become increasingly more difficult to write in this journal. I can only write when I’m positive he is out of the room, but even then he’s never out for more than half an hour. Though I’m not confined to this room, it’s where I feel safest…. Not that anywhere in this castle is safe when there’s a killer, psychotic dwarf on the loose. I mustn’t lose hope… I can’t. True it’s diminished to almost nothing, but even Thorin is a mere mortal. I **can** fight back. No more running, no more hiding, no more being scared. It’s time to bring back the Took side of me; this is the only chance I’ve got. _

He stopped writing when he heard footsteps coming down the hallway that led into his room. It was now or never. Shoving his journal away, Bilbo scurried to the doorway and hid himself behind the heavy door. He shivered in his spot with the pencil he used to write gripped firmly in his hand. With each passing second his adrenaline seemed to rise higher and higher, and his knuckles grew as white as snow the harder he clutch onto the pencil. Exhaling slowly one last time before the dwarf entered the room, Bilbo let loose a wild sounding scream and tackles the other male to the floor. Without hesitation he began to stab the end of the dulled pencil into the dwarf’s neck, puncturing the skin on the neck and forcing it in deep before jerking it out to repeat the savage action over an over. Blood spurted onto the Hobbit’s face and pooled onto the floor, his hand now drenched in dwarven blood.

            “B…Bilbo…?” A faint, weak voice barely made it out of those trembling lips from the dwarf beneath him.

The Hobbit stopped his brutal stabbing and instantly dropped the pencil. He screamed and rolled off of the dying dwarf. It was Dwalin.

            “D-Dwalin! What are you doing here?” He stammered and cradled the dwarf’s head in his arms. Tears sprung forth from his eyes and dripped onto the floor, mixing with the vibrant red that now soaked into his ragged clothes.

            “Bil…bo…” Dwalin’s eyes flitted to a close and he went entirely limp in Bilbo’s arms.

He let out a broken whimper and trembled on the ground. What had he done.

After several more moments of being paralyzed with shock, Bilbo gently laid Dwalin’s head down and took a step back from the body. He wiped his tears away with the back of his hand, evidently smearing the dwarf’s blood across his cheek, and stared down at the gruesome scene. Then his eyes were suddenly attracted to the bag Dwalin had strapped around his body, and Bilbo lunged for its contents. He pulled out two candlesticks and a crumpled letter.

_Dear Bilbo,_

_If I am for some reason unable to deliver these candles to you, I’ve instructed Dwalin to accomplish the task. These candles are not any ordinary candles, but are very dangerous explosives. DO NOT LIGHT THEM until you are sure you want to blow up anything within an 805-meter radius. You’ll have until the wax melts to the halfway point of the candle before the bomb goes off, so light it wisely. I’m sorry if this isn’t what you were hoping for, but maybe it’ll put an end to at least some of your torture. I’m not suggesting you should blow up our king, but considering the fact that Thorin can barely be considered a king among us anymore… Do you what you have to do. He’s changed, and I’m sure you’re aware of this. The dragon sickness has got too tight of a hold on him, I’m afraid there’s no chance to save him._

_Best wishes from your humble servant,_

_Balin_


	21. Chapter 21

_January 26 th, 2942_

_I’ve had the candles set up in our room unnoticed by Thorin, but I don’t know when I should light them if I can’t even leave this room without being monitored. I’m afraid that if worse comes to worse… I may have t_

The door to their room suddenly burst open and Thorin stumbled in haphazardly the way a drunken person stumbled into a room. He quickly shed his outerwear and boots before finally plunging into their bed. Bilbo, in the meantime, had frozen very still yet had managed to surreptitiously close his journal and tuck it away. When he heard a faint snoring come from the dwarf, he snuck over to the bedside and peered at Thorin’s unconscious body. He spotted the golden glint of the ring on Thorin’s chest, and felt a burst of optimism surge through his body. The ring. He could use it to escape.

Bilbo looked over Thorin before attempting to do anything, his eyes nervously flickering from the dwarf to his surroundings. Scrambling back to the pile of Thorin’s clothes, the Hobbit sifted through the pile until he found a dagger. He exhaled softly and shuddered at the sight of the weapon, bringing a hand to the hole where his eye used to be. Shaking off the memory, Bilbo stood up and quietly crept to the bedside once more. He inhaled through his nostrils, holding the dagger at the ready in case Thorin woke up, and reached over the dwarf’s body. The moment his fingers came into contact with the ring, Thorin’s wrist shot up and seized hold of Bilbo’s arm. He let a cry emit from his lips when he was pulled forwards and swung onto the bed with force.

            “WHAT ARE YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?” The king frothed at the mouth while he attempted to pin Bilbo down.

Bilbo offered no response save for violently thrashing. He managed to connect his fist to the side of Thorin’s jaw and stun him for a second, but was quickly pinned down afterwards. He continued to struggle underneath Thorin’s strong grasp, and flailed his legs until his knees managed to ram upwards into the dwarf’s stomach and his feet shoved the male to the side of the bed.

            “STOP IT!” Bilbo finally managed to scream out and scrambled to pick up the dagger.

Thorin lunged forwards and almost knocked the weapon out of his hand, but Bilbo proved quicker and escaped the dwarf’s aggressive grabbing.

            “YOU DON’T NEED TO DO THIS!” The Hobbit continued to scream and slid off to the other end of the bed. He began to switch from running left to right, faking his movements to try and throw the king off who was now mimicking his every movement on the other side of the bed.

When he started to make a run for it, Thorin leaped onto the bed and caught hold the Bilbo but his shirt. He began to pull Bilbo up to bed but shrunk back and released the Hobbit when Bilbo swung the dagger and managed to cut Thorin’s arm. The dwarf howled in pain and receded for only a moment before he was back to gnashing his teeth and wildly trying to suppress the other.

Bilbo rebutted by charging forwards until his head connected with the dwarf’s stomach and sent him flying backwards onto the bed. He swiftly climbed on top of the dazed dwarf and was about to bring the dagger down before he was almost jerked off of Thorin’s body with an abrupt twist of the king’s body. Rather than bringing the dagger down onto the chest of the dwarf, Bilbo had still managed to ram the weapon into the male’s right cheek all the way up until the hilt of the dagger rested on Thorin’s cheek. Thorin immediately threw Bilbo off of him and yelled in pain. He writhed on the bed and tried his best to pull out the dagger.

            “I’m sorry…” Bilbo sputtered as he watch the dwarf squirm in sheer agony. Then, with a quick flick of the wrist, he snatched the ring from the king and placed it onto his finger.

* * *

There was no time to waste and though he had left Thorin floundering in pain with a knife wedged deep into his cheek, Bilbo had no idea how long it might take for him to recover. Rushing down the haunting halls towards the main entrance of the castle, the Hobbit bustled down the mountain as quickly as possible and made his way to Dale. By the time he arrived the town the moon was nowhere to be seen and torrents of rain came pouring down. Drenched to the bone, disorientated, and sore in several places he hadn’t felt until now, Bilbo stumbled into the nearest pub and asked for help. With such a miserable looking demeanor, it wasn’t difficult to get a warm drink to soothe his overturned stomach and a table to himself in the corner of the room. Mid-drink Bilbo heard someone call his name.

He looked up frantically from his cup and saw Thorin with his teeth bared and blood oozing from his right eye. Bilbo fell to the floor and crawled backwards until he hit his head against the wall. He shut his eyes tightly and shielded his arms over his head. This was the end, wasn’t it?

            “Bilbo?” The voice repeated and when Bilbo peeked through his arms he realized that it wasn’t Thorin but actually his dear, old friend: Gandalf.

            “My goodness! Bilbo, my dear! Is that really you? I thought you had left for Bag End! What are you doing here? And what happened to you?” The soothing voice enveloped the shaking Hobbit and before Bilbo could even make out a single syllable, he passed out from exhaustion.

* * *

Bilbo woke up with a dizzying headache and the sounds of indistinct talking in the adjacent room. He propped himself up, wincing a bit, and strained his eye to peer into the nearby room. He could only spot the glimpse of a dark cloak and the familiar robe of the mighty wizard.

            “Oh, I see… What horrible luck…”

His ears picked on up the hushed conversation.

            “And here I thought he was safe in Bag End… I should have escorted him back home. Who would have thought that he’d be captured by Orcs.”

Orcs? Bilbo frowned to himself and tried to register what he had heard. Orcs didn’t capture him! He was captured by…

From the split second he took his gaze off the figures in the other room, Bilbo heard the metallic clattering of a sword and another heavy thud he could not distinguish. All at once the door leading into the room he was resting in was slammed open and in the doorway stood a hooded silhouette.

Too petrified to move, Bilbo redirected his gaze to behind the figure and could see Gandalf lying on the ground gasping for air. When the hooded figure moved closer to Bilbo is was revealed that the wizard’s throat had been brutally slashed at and blood was flowing effortlessly out of the male’s throat. He refocused back on the figure who was now looming over him.

“Found you.” Thorin hissed and Bilbo could see an intense fire burn in the figure’s eyes with the most disturbing and twisted of smiles carved into his face.

* * *

When Bilbo woke up after having been knocked out in Dale, he was strapped to a table and back in the spacious halls of the castle. He struggled to sit up and found that he could only lift himself up a few centimeters off the table. His breath turned shallow and his pulse began to quicken when he realized Thorin was nowhere to be seen. Almost to afraid to speak, the Hobbit parted his lips and mustered up the last bits of strength he had left in him.

            “T..Thorin?”

He was replied with an eerie silence. He tried to sit up again and was met with the same restraints and metal clanging.

            “Th…Thorin!?” He called out again and tried his best to look around.

            “Thori-” He was quickly muffled with a dirty cloth that the dwarf unexpectedly shoved into his mouth. His eye widened at the sight of the king and the large cleaver he held in his hand. He tried to say something of protest but was too muffled by the cloth that only pitiful sounding cries came out from his mouth.

            “I’m here, Bilbo. No need to be scared, I’m here for you. Don’t worry.” Thorin hissed the words into Bilbo’s ears before he placed a kiss on the male’s forehead.

            “I’m so glad I found you, I thought I had lost you forever.” He began to walk around the table Bilbo was strapped too.

            “You’re always full of surprises, Master Baggins. I must admit I’m a bit angry that you stabbed me.” He stopped at Bilbo’s left side and held a hand to his cheek. The wound there already began to coagulate, but his right eye look inflamed and carried a rich, red color. It made Bilbo cringe to look at, but he couldn’t help but monitor Thorin’s every movement out of fear.

            “But I forgive you.” He flashed Bilbo a grin, his unnaturally pointy teeth gleaming in perfect rows.

            “And I’ll keep on forgiving you for however many times you need me to tell you because I know that you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong… isn’t that right?” He chuckled softly to himself and held the cleaver up.

            “I just need to make sure you won’t try to run away again. Just think of this as a lesson… it’ll teach you to never put on that ring again, okay? That way I can always see your beautiful face.”

Bilbo squirmed fiercely under his restraints and tried to reason with the dwarf. Only muted cries came out when he spoke and realizing that all attempts to stop Thorin were futile, he remained still and felt hot tears well up in his eyes. Thorin stared into his face with an indescribable look and Bilbo gently shook his head. After a long time, Thorin raised the cleaver and brought it down to cut his pinky and ring finger clean off. Bilbo screeched and tried to pull his hand away, the metal cuffs around his wrists biting into his skin and preventing him from escape. Thorin inhaled deeply and rotated his head around his shoulders in delight. He held the cleaver up once more and sliced his middle and index finger off up to the knuckle. Bilbo bit down hard on the saliva soaked fabric and squeezed his eye tight. The pain almost made him pass out on the spot, but Thorin made sure to keep the Hobbit awake by giving him time to recuperate before he continued the punishment. He heaved painfully, chest rising and falling with tortured gasps, and opened his eye again in a blurry daze.

            “Almost done, Bilbo! Don’t worry, you’re doing great.” Thorin smiled pleasingly to himself at the sight of Bilbo’s mutilated hand and leaned down to give his forehead another peck.

            “Almost done…” He licked his lips and brought the cleaver up one final time, but instead of cutting off his thumb, he chopped off Bilbo’s entire hand up to his wrist. Since his hand was finally disconnected, he could easily slip his stump of an arm through the cuff and quickly retracted it to his chest. Tears spilled from Bilbo’s eye and he twisted in pain while blood continued to stream out from the wound.

Thorin dropped the cleaver to the ground and grinned wickedly. He kissed Bilbo on the forehead for a third time and whispered into his ear.

            “I forgive you.”


	22. Chapter 22

_February 13 th, 2942_

_I can’t take this anymore. Thorin has the ring again and there’s not possible way for me to escape. I can barely write and see and I want to die. I’m going to use the candles tonight; I don’t care if I die anymore. Anything will be better than the torment of living here. How sad is that? I started a life-threatening adventure nearly a year ago and nothing is more horrible than this. I wish I hadn’t stayed in Erebor. I wish I hadn’t fallen in love with Thorin. I wish I hadn’t met any of the dwarves. I wish I hadn’t… I wish I were dead._

Bilbo pushed the journal away and began to weep. He held his face with his right hand and rested his face on the table. At last he managed to somewhat compose himself and in a matter of seconds, he lit the candles with the pack of hidden matches Balin had given to him. Now all he needed to do was get Thorin back into the room and wait for the candles to melt halfway. He sniffed and hobbled to the doorway, tears still streaming down his cheek.

            “Thorin! Thorin!” He called several times and only pulled back into the room and crawled onto the bed when he heard hurried steps coming towards the room. A tired smile crossed his face when Thorin finally entered the room.

            “What is it my dear?” The dwarf seemed surprised to see Bilbo sitting patiently on the bed.

            “I thought… I thought… that I would like you to stay with me. I miss you.” He forced the disgusting words out of his mouth and held his right hand towards the other.

Thorin seemed ecstatic by Bilbo’s sudden acceptance and quickly rushed to his lover’s side.

            “I’ve missed you too… I’m so glad to hear those words come from your mouth.” The male confessed quickly, and he gave Bilbo a swift kiss on the lips before shedding his clothes off. When the dwarven king pulled the last article of clothing off his body and exposed himself to the cool, evening air, Bilbo recoiled from the sight and felt his stomach churn.

Under all those clothes that Thorin wore, his body appeared to be disfigured and his bones seem to protrude in a most grotesque manner. The scars that marred his skin twisted in an ugly and frightening manner, branching off into different segments and connecting in other places to almost make it seem like he had grown scales on his body. When the dwarf moved his arms, his back muscles gave way and it looked like something was trying to dig its way out of his skin—almost as if he were growing a pair of deformed wings. Bilbo grimaced when Thorin began to caress his cheek and mutter revoltingly, sweet nothings into his ear. While Thorin busied himself by kissing Bilbo’s neck, he kept his eye sternly glued to the candle and watched as the wax dripped lower and lower.

At last Thorin inhaled Bilbo’s scent deeply and brought his lips back to the Hobbit’s mouth.

            “Do you love me?” Thorin breathed softly.

Bilbo blinked quickly and felt his mouth dry up. The wax continued to drip and the shadows form the flame danced across his dismal face. His lower lip began to quiver when he parted his mouth to speak.

            “I…”

A blinding, white light suddenly filled the room and an ear-piercing ringing echoed throughout the empty, disease-ridden halls of Erebor. The room that the two were in came crashing down, thick slabs of marble smashing into the ground below and creating large puffs of smoke. The commotion was large enough to alarm the people of Dale, and soon Men were swarming the castle to figure out what had happened and see if anyone was hurt.


	23. Chapter 23

_February 14 th, 2942_

            _I’m surprised I survived the explosion. If it weren’t for the people of Dale, I’m sure I would’ve died in the rubble—I was the only survivor of the accident. His dead body was recovered not too long ago. For some odd reason I couldn’t bring myself to cry. He was a good person, and despite our failing relationship in the past recent months I will miss him. I hope he rests in peace, my dear_

He stopped writing when a surge of hushed whispers flooded his mind. Pushing the charred journal away, the male picked up the golden ring that lay next to him and held it up against the moonlight.

A smile began to creep along Thorin’s lips as he marveled at the beautiful glint of the ring.

            “My dear… precious.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta-daaaaaaaa!  
> I have no means of explaining anything.   
> Thank you for reading and I would suggest reading my other [story](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5348198/chapters/12350114) because it's more about feel good, cute things with a mermaid and Kíli, but I've barely begun and it's already on hiatus. XD  
> So I s'pose in the meanwhile if you're feeling bad about this fic I suggest reading [this](http://archiveofourown.org/works/634290/chapters/1150509) lovely Bagginshield story. It's long but it's so well written and I love it so much! 
> 
> Anyways, thanks a bunch for reading through this fic and I don't even know what to say about it.   
> Until next time!


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